Q Ball Bingo: 10 Things I’m Sure You’ll See at Our Halloween Bash
Halloween is rapidly approaching and if you don't have tickets to the Q Ball at Aura in Portland yet, you better get a move on it. Tickets are just $9.79 each at the Aura box office and online (plus applicable fees). Once you've got your ticket and your kick-ass costume, grab your imaginary bingo card and keep an eye out for the 10 things you're sure to see at this (or any) halloween bash.
1) The Hard-Core Halloweener
I'll start with this party staple because I am one. At every halloween party, you'll find someone who made their elaborate costume from scratch and balks at your online alternative. As I like to say, "Halloween ain't Halloween without a s&*%-load of DIY!"
2) The Thirsty and Unashamed
Since you ditched your middle school unicorn onesie for the sexy devil tail and horns, you've known halloween is universally accepted as an excuse for people to go out half-naked. You can throw on a miniskirt and bra, add some ears and call yourself a mouse. Somehow, it's socially acceptable on this day only and if that's your jam, more power to you.
3) The Unlikely Couple
For those of you who aren't in a committed relationship, your night may involve a makeout sesh with someone whose costume is hilariously different from your own. My favorites in years past: Tinker Bell and Walter White of Breaking Bad, Jack Sparrow and Spiderman, a raincloud and a snail. PDA has never been so entertaining.
4) The Uber-Obscure
It's fun to think out of the box when brainstorming for costumes, but sometimes people get carried away and are left explaining their costumes all night. On the plus side, when the rare person *does* recognize what they're dressed up as, it's EXTREMELY EXCITING.
5) The Straight-Up Offensive
I'd love to say we're above this as a respectful, educated population, but the odds of you still coming across someone who crossed the line of funny to offensive are unfortunately high. If you're not sure whether your costume is offensive, just be sure to avoid painting your skin a color that some people actually are, and borrowing the cultural garb of any people who have fallen victim to hate crimes, genocide, or slavery. In short- keep it light, aight?
6) The PC Police
On the flip side of the above point, you will always find people who will manage to get offended by any costume you could fathom. Excuse me, are you Professor X? That's highly offensive to the handy-capable. What's that, you're a Jackie Chan? That's cultural appropriation of the Kung Fu master himself. As long as your costume abides by the rules above, pay no mind to these hyper-critical PC police; they just want to be mad about something.
7) The Barfably Cute Couple
"You're the avocado to my toast!" "You're the bacon to my eggs!" "I'm his milk and he's my cookie!" We get it, you're in love. Don't get me wrong, I love a good couples costume - but if you're gonna play the matching game, why not be clever about it? One year, I was Charlotte and Andrew was my web. Below, we were Uber and Lyft. #GOALS.
8) The Half-Asser
I had a boyfriend in college who wore a white t-shirt that he had written "go ceilings!" on in Sharpie. Get it? He was a ceiling fan. Haaaaa... the punvalue does not make up for the blatant lack in effort, dude. Needless to say, we weren't a great match given my intense passion for elaborate costumes. But that's not to say it's everyone's cup of tea! There are tons of half-assers out there for each other. You'll be sure to find more than one in any halloween celebration.
9) The Hyper-Relevant
This is several years old now, but the double rainbow video (along with countless other classic internet memes) makes for a phenomenal costume idea.
10) The Classics
You got your Rosie the Riveters. Your Where's Waldos. Your witches, ballerinas, and scary clowns. Hey, nothin' wrong with going old school. They're called classics for a reason, and you'll be sure to come across your fair share at the Q Ball.
Keep an eye out for the home-made x-wing fighter pilot complete with highly accurate control panel and helmet from scratch, that's me!