It’s Really Hard to Love Your Neighbor When They Don’t Return Your Stuff

It's a tale as old as time.  You have great neighbors and respect their property, and you figure they feel the same.  After all, you have neighborhood gatherings, and everyone is so friendly.  In fact, you call them all friends. You know, "Love Thy Neighbor".

So when your neighbor asks to borrow something, you quickly say "sure", expecting they will return the item when they're finished with it.

Well, let me tell you a few stories that really grinds my gears.

We live in a close-knit neighborhood.  My neighbor asked to borrow our big ladder.  It was no problem, and we walked it over.   That ladder was used, then put on the side of his house for an entire year without ever being returned.  We could see it from our window, and waited and waited, but it was never returned.

Finally, my husband went over, grabbed it, and brought it home. Ok, first offense.  We'll get over it.

Then a year later, another neighbor asked to borrow our snow blower as his had died, so we said "sure".   That snow blower didn't come back for weeks, until we had to ask for it as we braced for the next snowstorm.  Ugh, not again.

Then, another neighbor had asked to borrow a three-season historical DVD set for a series he missed.  He was really into history, so we said "sure".  He asked to "borrow" it, so we "assumed" it would be returned.  Six months later, we asked him how he liked the series, and he said it was great, and gave the boxed set to his son in Boston.  At that point, we knew we'd never get it back.

Then the neighbor realized he should have returned it and bought us a new DVD set, but that's not the point.

Finally, the same neighbor asked to borrow our fire pit for a party he was having for his daughter.  Hesitantly, we said "sure".  Of course, it did not come back to our home once the party was over.

In fact, our neighbors sold their house and moved away, but our fire pit was still in their yard.  Imagine our surprise when we saw the new neighbors using our fire pit.

Are we too nice? Is it un-neighborly to say no to borrowing stuff? I guess the only thing to avoid this is to move to the woods with no neighbors.  C'est la vie .