Three Adult Fantasies I Had Today (SFW, I Promise)

When you're a kid, you fantasize about being a grownup and having the autonomy to make decisions on your own, like go get a new puppy, eat brownies for breakfast, or put a kiddie pool in your living room. Oh sweet little past you, if only you could peek into the future and see what adults actually fantasize about. While I already have a puppy, have certainly had my fair share of brownie dinners, and, well, I'm the one who would have to clean up after a kiddie pool in my living room, so that thought came and went pretty quickly.

Instead of these exciting fantasies I always thought I'd have when I grew up, my brain entertains slightly less joyful childlike visions. Here are 3 examples just from today:

1) A Clean Fan!

I knowww I know I know, I could get out the screwdriver and take off the face of the fan and painstakingly remove every square centimeter of hair and lint and dust that has become lodged in the crevices of my 24/7 summer fan, buuuuut we both know I'm not gonn' do it. NOT GONN' DO IT! But oh man is it fun to fantasize about having a beautiful clean fan. Adulting, amiright?

2) An Alert to Send Pictures After Hanging Up the Phone

Does this happen to anyone else? No matter how thrilling my phone conversation is or how excited I am to send a picture after hanging up, I inevitably forget and go about my day! I need a phone call version of Gmail's notification that tell you "We see the word 'attached' in your email, did you mean to attach a document?" Can we invent some kind of app that monitors my phone calls and hears me say "I'll send it to you!" and then alerts me when I end the call to send over whatever I meant to send!! Creepy, sure, but very useful.

3) A 24/7 CVS Within Walking Distance

Don't get me wrong - I *have* a CVS within walking distance of my apartment, but this one closes at 9pm and I always seem to remember the things I urgently need at 8:58pm. So for this adult who realizes my tummyache hasn't gone away and I'd really like to go grab some Pepto Bismol now, a 9pm closure is quite inconvenient. Just imagining a 24-7 CVS around the corner makes me let out a sigh of relief.