There may have been a point in my life when I might have been able to learn this. But now, I'm too old and frankly I don't want to learn. But without fail, whenever I share that I can't do 'this' someone will say, 'Oh I can teach you!' 

I CAN'T SWIM

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Most of you are probably gasping right now saying:

What? You don't know how to swim?!

Yup. I don't. For a couple of reasons. I almost drowned as a kid...twice. So, that's not helping. Plus, I grew up in land locked Idaho. It's not like there was an ocean right there, or even a lake really.

Oh sure there were pools, but I prefer to dip my feet and maybe get up to my chest. If it's hot enough and there is a noodle in the pool, I'll go in and swim around with a noodle.

A) Don't feel bad for me. I'm absolutely fine with it.

B) I won't drown, because if I'm ever in a situation where I could drown, trust me, I'll have a life jacket on.

C) No. You can't teach me to swim. Ask Wayne about the time a few years ago I almost drowned HIM as he tried to get me across the Saco River.

D) I mean it. You can't teach me to swim, so stop thinking you can. Teddy bought me swimming lessons for a Christmas present one year. Never went.

E) I'm absolutely fine with it. Oh sure, spending a week where we spent time either in a pool or at the beach makes me wish a little I knew how to swim. But certainly not enough of an urge to do anything about it.

 

I can't be the only freak face out there that can't swim. I mean, I will sink-to-the-bottom-(I will!)-and-die can't swim. Anyone else who can't swim and is okay with it?

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