If you were to know one single fact about me it’s that my grandmother was my very best friend.

My grandmother, my mother, my best friend, and my soul sister.

My Gwammie and I had a relationship that was beyond Earthly understanding and shared a bond I am blessed and fortunate to still carry with me.

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I imagined our relationship would blossom and grow into my adult years and that she would be beside me for every move I made as I matured into the adult and woman she helped raise me to be, I looked forward to her helping me navigate my career and my life, but I sadly lost her two years ago right before I graduated college.

She’s the reason I am a first-generation college graduate. She is the reason I have and continue to travel abroad. She is the reason I have this job. She is the reason I am the woman I am today.

Every single decision I have made in my life has gone through my grandmother. She has never told me what to do but has always guided my decision-making, coached me in always making the right moves, and talked over endless early-morning coffees and late-night martinis to help me work through every aspect of my life.

I never expected that I would not have her when I needed her most, as I navigate my first career and start my life as an adult on my own when I need her guidance and advice now more than I ever have before.

I know she is with me in every moment but now I have to find new ways of seeking her guidance.

Psychic Experiences at Leapin’ Lizards in Portland

Coming from a spiritual family, I’ve always been drawn to spiritual workings that help me mentally, spiritually, emotionally, and physically.

I don’t abuse the practice but in times of uncertainty, I lean on psychics and tarot readings to help me gain an understanding of where I’ve been in life, where I am now, and where I am going.

I am currently facing a difficult decision and need to talk to my grandmother about it more than I’ve ever needed her advice before. Since I no longer have the crutch to lean on, I went to a psychic at Leapin’ Lizards in Portland for some semblance of direction.

I always go into these things hoping she makes an appearance, which she often does, but my most recent experience has left me feeling overwhelmed, emotional, and grateful.

My Cup Runneth Over

At my most recent psychic appointment, Pam was shuffling the tarot cards when a single card flew out of her hand, up in the air, and landed face-up in her lap.

She gasped and said, "this card isn't part of your reading but for some reason, it wants to be part of this and wants to be present. I will put it off to the side and we can look at it after and see if it fits into the bigger picture."

The reading ended up being the directional advice I needed, specifically pertaining to a particular issue I'm working through. As we were wrapping up, she lifted the rogue card up to me. It was the Ace of Cups that read:

"My cup runneth over."

That was my Gwammie's favorite saying. It's the very last line I wrote and spoke in her eulogy. It's the saying I am getting tattooed on my arm in her handwriting.

I know my Gwammie is with me in every moment, I feel her presence heavy and constant, but it's moments like these when she shows herself in such powerful and overwhelming ways that I know she is still setting a path for me, guiding and protecting me, and helping me navigate life.

It may seem small to you but it meant the world to me. It was the sign I needed to let me know she is here and she is guiding my way and laying down my path ahead.

Thank you for staying present with me, my Gwammie.

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