Do Any Maine Families Have a ‘Poop Knife’?
All families have weird traits they share, but this poor guy didn't realize how unusual his family's solution to theirs was until the age of 22.
Reddit user @learnedbutt graced us with his own confession that his family dealt with behemoth excretions in their own unique way: a poop knife.
We've all been there. You take a trip to the John and relieve yourself in one fell swoop. Upon tidying up the scene and reflecting on your creation, you come to the realization that your log may take multiple flushes to disappear. If you're like me, your best solution in this situation is to pray to the poop gods that this toilet has superflush powers and that your excretion is more flexible than it looks.
@Learnedbutt's family took matters into their own hands and equipped themselves with a bathroom cutlet. Sanitation issues aside, you gotta be impressed with their ingenuity. Unfortunately, this poor man's family didn't fill him in that this wasn't common practice and he had to find that out the hard way: after requesting his friend's poop knife at a gathering full of strangers.
If you're not already cringing, the misunderstanding to follow will probably get you there.
The best part of all this is how long it takes our poor friend's realization to set in. The possibility that his family was alone in this tradition doesn't even cross his mind until it's way too late to backpedal.
After this man's confession went public, scores of redditors came out in solidarity with their own families' fixes, including rulers, "shatulas", and scissors, according to the ever-expanding thread.
I grew up off the grid and my family didn't have indoor plumbing until I was in preschool, so I vividly remember trudging outside to use our outhouse. Until now, I hadn't realized the huge perk of not having to stress the flush.
One question remains: Does your family employ a poop knife or other equivalent in the restroom? And if not, how are those prayers working out?