To The Man In Portland With The ‘All Lives Matter’ Bumper Sticker
My name is Brittany and today I was driving behind you and your truck in Portland. I noticed an "All Lives Matter" sticker on your truck. A big one. Seeing that sticker and your truck I have made some assumptions that I'd love to discuss.
You may be familiar with political commentator/late night web series host, Steven Crowder. Yes, the guy from those "Change My Mind" memes and YouTube videos. One thing that he does that I love, is he makes sure that, before diving into discourse, they define their terms and ask questions to gain a better understanding. That way, both parties are going into it with the same baseline understanding of the topic at hand as well as each other. Since this is an open letter let me define my assumptions of how you perceive "All Lives Matter" and "Black Lives Matter" so you and other readers have a better understanding of where I'm coming from.
The assumption I'm making is that you see the phrase "Black Lives Matter" and take that as being offensive to your white self. (I could see you in your side mirror and you appeared white. Forgive me if I'm incorrect.) As if that phrase insinuates that your life doesn't matter in comparison.
Buddy, I am as white as they come and have an Ancestry DNA test proving so. I'd be so mad if someone told me my life didn't matter simply because I'm pastier than a Hefty paper plate.
I'd like to take a moment to say, for the record, that no one (save for a few wackadoodles) thinks your life doesn't matter on account of the color of your skin.
Saying "All Lives Matter" is like saying, "Hey everyone, the sky is blue!" Yes, Captain Obvious, we're well aware.
Or it's like showing up at a Breast Cancer Awareness fundraiser with a sign that says, "All Cancers Matter!" Yes, Captain Obvious, we're well aware, but right now we're talking about this one.
You see, the phrase "Black Lives Matter" excludes no one out of malice.
Now, you might say, "Yes, Captain Obvious, I'm well aware that black lives matter." Good. There are some wackadoodles who aren't. And I think it's perfectly fair and reasonable to discuss who those wackadoodles are, how they got to be wackadoodly, if their wackadoodlism was brought on by something systemic or not, and what the best course of action is to handle them.
So, I would like to give you the benefit of the doubt and reiterate that I assume that you felt excluded. That you felt the narrative was saying that not all lives matter, only black ones. Perhaps no one took the time to explain the meaning to you. I hope this makes you feel better because again, I'd be pretty upset if someone said my life didn't matter. Thankfully no one is. At least not to my face.
I'm not here to discuss the BLM movement as a whole. Agree, disagree, there's a lot of nuance with the topic and this particular letter isn't the time or place to get into that. Again, I wanted to do my best to outline my assumptions and get to one key point in this letter.
If "All Lives Matter" WHY WERE YOU DRIVING LIKE THEY DON'T?!
(Yes, I realize this letter took a turn for those expecting a political tirade to either "YASSS QUEEN" this or "sTiCk To PlAyInG mUsIc" that.)
For goodness sake, dude. Pick a lane. You were clearly trying to pick your fastest route up Forest Ave attempting to weave in and out of traffic in an already congested area. And then weaving so much you nearly went on the sidewalk.
If all lives matter, like you say, use your blinker, check over your shoulder, give yourself enough commute time so finding the fastest route isn't a nearly literal live or die situation.
If you're going to sport such a bold sticker, understand what it's saying in the current climate, and at least act you believe what it says. Otherwise, you look like a hypocritical dimwit with the intellectual capacity of a pinecone. As I said, I didn't want to assume you had the intellectual capacity of a pinecone off a sticker alone, I wanted to assume there was just a misunderstanding, but your behavior? Well, that ended up being a very different story.